If I said I have an “ant problem,” what would that mean to you? It is difficult to give numerical estimates of ants, but I would say that an “ant problem” constitutes several individual ants crawling around unwelcomely, generally in sugar-prone areas. An “ant problem” can be dealt with by a good, sound cleaning of the affected areas. Done deal.
If I said I have an “ant infestation,” what would that mean to you? Much worse than a mere “ant problem,” this level of insect nuisance is both disgusting and frustrating beyond belief. An “ant infestation” constitutes a line(s) of ants in various portions of your living space, particularly in kitchen-type places. The cure for an “ant infestation” requires both cleaning and further prevention, such as traps or other chemical prevention.
I wish I could say that either of the above situations reflected what is currently occurring in our kitchen. Sadly, the most apropos title would probably be an “Ant Pandemonium.“
It all began last semester when our windowsill became a convenient place to absentmindedly leave things, such as drinks. And then they came. At first, only a few, but then more and more starting showing up to share in the windowsill buffet. My roommates and I dealt with that particular problem, but by then the clever devils had already recognized the smorgasbord our room could provide.
Enter the trashcan. The ants discovered this receptacle and had a field day for quite some time. While we also dealt with this problem, we realized too late that if they were in our trash can, they had already traveled to the kitchen. Come to find that, not only had they discovered the kitchen, but they are now originating from the sealing between the wall and the floor. I repeat, the devils are living in our kitchen.
Thus, the Ant Pandemonium began.
Almost overnight, after we ousted them from the trash, they formed ranks and began swarming onto our counterspace, searching for morsels of any kind. They infiltrated every nook and cranny of our kitchen with military precision, bringing more all the time. Our previous countermeasures no longer phased the monster that we had created. I began hiding all food in the cupboards high above the counters, only to find ants there the next morning. [For some reason, I thought that, despite the fact that we live on the second floor, those extra three feet would stop them. Negative.] We bought ant poison; they scoffed and brought reinforcements. We bleached every surface of our kitchen; they endured.
And now, the ants have dominion over our kitchen. They are unstoppable.
It is as if I am living in France in 1942—I am in my homeland, but it is occupied by an insidious foe. My roommates and I have begun considering more radical options, such as scorching our kitchen with lighter fluid. In jest, I suggested that we simply burn the dormitory to the ground. However, I realized that even if we did, the ants would still survive.
And their greatest victory yet—I have even written about them on my blog.
With two weeks left in the semester, I am, regretfully, burying my head in the sand and hoping that the ants will have some shred of mercy upon us.
[...] reference to the ant pandemonium, an acquaintance of mine who is, shall we say, more in tune with the natural world than yours truly [...]
By: End Of Semester Bookends « Hark, I hear the Harpsy Turtle on Wednesday, May 13, 2009
at 6:36 pm